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The second cut is the deepest. Or something. Where the opener against New York was a first glimpse, tonight is an introduction, the home opener to the most hotly anticipated Bulls season since 2011 and the second and hopefully final return of Derrick Rose. Tonight’s opponent is one that we should get to know very well over four divisional games this season and potentially as many as seven more in the playoffs: the Cleveland Cavaliers. On the surface, it’s simple. The Bulls stomped the Knicks. Last night, those same Knicks beat the Cavs in their home opener. The transitive property dictates that the Bulls should win by 70. The transitive property rarely accounts for LeBron James.
The Cavs had a decent enough offseason, I suppose, trading first overall pick (and potential bust) Andrew Wiggins and former first overall pick Anthony Bennett (fraud) for Kevin Love (whiner trader baby who will never make the playoffs), while also signing Mike Miller (old and busted), James Jones (busted) and Shawn Marion (old) to small deals, all to facilitate the return of LeBron James (Artichoke Saltbaby). I GUESS they’ll be alright, but we all know basketball is really about grit and toughness and mental fortitude and passing fortitude checks so your armor of gritty tough playoff leadership chemisty mithril survives long enough to get RINGZZZZ. So we’ll see.
Honestly, I’m too excited about it to put together rational thoughts other than, for the first time in a long time, the Eastern Conference truly runs through the Central Division. This might be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
*all parenthesis and hot takes courtesy of THE INTERNET
*Also, it’s Halloween, or something.
*Also also, Jimmy Butler rejected an extension. HAPPY HALLOWEEN.
Probable Starters
Chicago Bulls (1-0, 1st in Central, 1st in East)
C: Joakim Noah, 8th season. 3.0 points, 6.o rebounds, 3.0 blocks.
PF: Pau Gasol, 14th season. 21.0 points, 11.o rebounds, 0.0 assists.
SF: Mike Dunleavy, 13th season. 0.0 points, 4.0 assists, 3.0 rebounds.
SG: Kirk Hinrich, 12th season. 12.0 points, 1.0 rebounds, 1.0 assists.
PG: Derrick Rose, 6th season. 13.0 points, 5.0 assists, 3.0 rebounds.
Cleveland Cavaliers (0-1, 3rd in Central, 9th in East)
C: Anderson Varejao, 11th season. 10.0 rebounds, 4.0 rebounds, 1.0 blocks.
PF: Kevin Love, 7th season. 19.0 points, 14.o rebounds, 4.0 assists.
SF: LeBron James, 12th season. 17.0 points, 5.0 rebounds, 4.0 assists.
SG: Dion Waiters, 3rd season. 10.0 points, 2.0 assists, 1.0 steals.
PG: Kyrie Irving, 4th season. 22.0 points, 7.0 assists, 5.0 rebounds.
Key Matchup(s): Pretty Much Everything. Noah, Taj and Gasol vs Varejao, Love and Tristan Thompson. Dunleavy and McDermott vs Mike Miller and Dion Waiters. Rose vs Irving. The shrill horns of fate vs the chances of LeBron having another bad game.
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